此刻的心情很复杂。还是很复杂。
真的是觉得我不能当记者啦..我想我会是一个很失败的记者吧...
i was telling wendy i just feel like hiding at home, be alone, and sleep like nobody business.
i'm super drained out of energy. i wanna hibernate!! haha. and wendy is right. i guess i have really been socialising too much and i need some personal time for myself. it's super late now, and it's very quiet except for the ticking sound of the clock in my room and the sound my keyboard produces when i type. i'm reflecting on all the things that had happened since i started my IAP while i'm typing this entry.
i realised i have really been missing out a lot of stuffs and i'm not feeling good about it. but i'm glad that i did attended freda's 21st birthday party! girl, i'll send you the photos and videos by like wed ok! :) i've missed out many outings with my friends due to attachment and i'm not liking it. it struck upon me that when we really enter our working life, will we end up with no friends at all? sigh. i will die then!!
there are two major things that i need to pick up fast desperately in my upcoming months of IAP. learning the art of rejection and becoming an emotionless person. WOO. emotionless. that's so not me. but what to do. this is what a reporter should be i guess? yea. sis said work is work, personal life is personal life...i understand that.. but wont i be a person with split personality already then?! sigh.
am not gonna talk much about URTO today... like i've said.. my feelings are very mixed. i somehow feel that there's like sadness in the air and the feeling is not good lah. and again, i feel for those who had performed well like zhenhuan but the outcome doesn't justify it. i'm not gonna let my emotions swarm over me anymore. so i should stop saying what i personally feel? i shall just keep them in my dreams. HAHA. to which, i really did dreamt of URTO. *shrugs!*
it's really late. i gotta work tmr. going to sleep now. hope tomorrow will be a better day :)
